Hell Continued

I have one Chemo treatment and 6 radiation treatments left to go. Would have been 5 but the lineal accelerator had a "Glitch" in it so no rads today.

The last 2 weeks has been the "fun stuff", puking up/coughing up large amounts of mucous 24/7.  Sleep provided by oxycodone/Xanax/Ativan in 2-3 hour stretches through the day and night. Nausea and fatigue are my best friends.

tube feedings don't agree with me much either. Weight loss from 344 to 287. Intense mouth pain, tongue doesn't work at all for taste and hurts like hell too, swallowing only water with meds. Getting ready to have to crush up some and run them through the tube as they're too big to swallow.  Can talk for about 5 minutes before the pain gets to be too much.

Almost to the end of treatment, but will be another 4 weeks before symptoms subside. Can't even think about anything but getting through the present day.   Never take drinking a soda or a beer or having a meal for granted again.

Comments

[Valerie Longfellow]

When Warren Zevon got cancer, David Letterman asked him what he was learning through his ordeal and his answer was "Enjoy every sandwich". My Aunt Adele had cancer and ended up w/ a feeding tube, unable to eat solid food. One day, she had such an incredible craving for kielbasa that she cooked a piece up for herself. One bite and she started choking. She was afraid, because she lived alone and didn't want to die in her kitchen. She spit the kielbasa out. When she told me the story, she said, "You know, you might think you're ready to go, but when it comes down to it, you're really not.' She was always on one diet or another trying to lose 10 lbs. 'then I got cancer and lost weight the hard way."

I'm so sorry you're going through this and know when you're not posting here, you're probably having a hellish time of it. Please know you're in my prayers, Hank.

[Marty]

Ditto here, Hank. With your description of your ordeal, I always marvel that you can post! Thanks for the update. I hope the act of letting us know is itself some measure of relief for you. We are, indeed, praying for you!

[hank]

Valerie--you're one of the good 'uns.
Marty--You've no idea. Both Oncologists said head and neck cancer is the most difficult for the patient to deal with the treatment. One said "it's just brutal".

Now I understand why cancer patients say they'd rather just expire than go thru it more than once. I'm worn down to a nub. I always thought I had more fight in me than this.

One of my Marine comrades who's had it told me I'd wish I was dead before it is over. Passed that mark a few weeks back. Last Chemo was today, taking 2 rad treatments on Wed. so I can be done on Friday. Then I've got about a month before I start feeling normal.

[Paul]

I'm glad to hear you've had your last chemo treatment. I read your post I hope I never find out what it's like. Hank's and the Haiti post by Marty and I realize I have it pretty darn good. Hopefully when you start to feel a little more normal You can enjoy a beer and sandwich.

-Peace!

[Chris]

Hank, I feel so bad for you having to go through all this. I can only imagine. As you said in your post, you just need to take it one day at a time. Once the 6 treatments are done, you can focus on the fact that your body is healing. Still painful, but at least then the trend will be toward improvement. You're in my prayers.

[hank]

Valerie--Actually Poo's comment made no sense to me. Shot right over my head. I figured---He lives in freakin KENTUCKY, he's allowed to make no sense. I mean, how much sense does Rand Paul make???